me: really, i just wanted an excuse to eat ketchup. i want lots of ketchup. if i could eat ketchup alone,i would.
anonymous other: see, i could eat mustard alone.
me: ew, i couldn't.
anonymous other: well, i mean not ALONE. but like...without anything else.
me: essentially, we're all alone...always. in everything we do.
anonymous other: oh...
me: so, by the transitive property of ketchup, i am always alone.
good night.
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