some of it not all of it

it's really stange, the way and timing which things have, or the way that things just suddenly appear never anticipated or expected. for most of these things, i just want to hide forever. and i want to know the meaning of all those strange dreams last night. i want to know the meaning of way more than meaning can ever begin to explain. there are too many "things" that no one can know, or in telling someone these things, they wouldn't be real anymore, and they're only real until they're explained because words never do justice. i did something tonight that i haven't done in a long time. i'm not proud, and i'm not disappointed. i just did, and i am. and i am still. this was nothing profound, everything just goes to show. and everyone keeps going in their own bubble and i can't say i'm any different. people don't really want to help when help is needed, and it's even just really hard to actually explain the definition of "help" and that it's even needed in the first place, ever. ever never everrrrrrrrr. forever.

so it goes

i have a horrible attention span




i think i'm in my selfish stage, more than ever. all i want is for someone to touch me, pay attention to me, think about me. want to be near me. i want lots of people to touch me all at once. i want them all over me...and then i want them to leave me alone when i decide i need to be alone which is often. is that weird?




so much for sweet dreams




it is what it is

-kc

ps these are some of the animations i've been working on this semester so far, sorry the quality is bad, especially on the last one. web res, EWWW! come to my senior thesis exhibition to see it all in mad legit form

IS/WAS

I am this solid, blank creature. Blank enough for you to write on me, but you have to press your pen so hard it’s just making blank indentations—no real words. The dying thought merged with the moving mind and it was all one piece glued together from so many different fractured wholes. The holes were covered but they were actually once there.
-kc

the last summer

i hate deadlines for fun. the end of summers forever is the deadline to my fun, FOREVER

how could you?

summer is almost over
and i just wanted summer always
because summer is nothing
and i am nothing
and we are perfect together.

unfortunately, there are things expected of us
(us = humankind)
and i must attempt to fulfill expectations
despite surprising people that i function as i do.






















hey hey dirty jerz

mein mini-dachshund

i'm trying to learn how to speak german to my black colored miniature dachshund.
this is my summer project.
so far, the highlights of what i know how to say are:

"you are a very stinky dog"
"STAY!"
"that dog has chubby paws"
"you are very black!"
"that friend has a triangle shaped head"
"that is my stink friend!"

i'm learning more ASAP.

oh yeah and i'm also trying to learn how to play the harmonica except i'm doing it by instinct.

DAS IST GUT

A Venn Diagram

sunny weather then dreary and violent rain, sleep split into two parts, doctor's visit with potentially bad news, high highs and really low lows, strange burning eyes, sketchbook delirium and potential southbound adventures, the dark and deep dive exploration hypothesis, pain pain physical pain taking over, bad words (mouth like a sailor) and unfortunate words accidentally shared, coping and moping, sunny summer smiles, tumultuous summer thunder interrupting, rain on road and red hot wet face, the dive and the floating back to the top, drowning the whole time (slowly).

...all in a day's time.

[there was a period of time where i had qualms keeping an online journal, then i realized i'm intensely fond of all forms of documentation of the fleeting present which is actually the past once it's written down. hence the resurrection of the (somewhat) daily online blog.]

Currently Listening: Suede "Sleeping Pills"

Location: Center Valley, PA

images copyright katelyn roof 2007

PS. once i unpack my 2G memory card for my digital camera i plan to i guess embark on photodocumentation of my last summer of "childhood" before i graduate and peace out of the east coast for sunnier shores and a more inspiring landscape.

the soundtrack to my nightmare

image copyright katelyn roof 2007

Primitive Heart

This is documentation of my unfortunate bike accident on the night of The Cure at Radio City. my key went into my finger and you could at one point see to the bone, i feel really awesome and street because of it (street cred points through the ROOOOF).

in other news, the studly Brad Walsh did a post on my photography on his blog, check it out (Junk Mag), it's a few posts down

I'm going to use this blog mostly for shameless self-promotion, general retardation, and art.

Below is one panel of a triptych projection/installation i did this past year. I didn't want to go through the HTML hell of posting the entire triptych (which would freeze your computer anyway), so here is the center panel with the audio soundtrack i edited myself completely from field recordings done with an M audio recorder.

(i hope the sound is working, let me know if it is not.)

-kc

currently listening: XTC - "Ladybird"
current location: center valley, PA